l>.head font-family:Arial,Helvetica,Verdana; font-size:16px; font-weight:bold;.body font-family:arial, verdana, sans-serif; font-size:13px;.top font-family:Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size:11px; hoax Time!!! hoax Time!!! posted by jan Bulagik on April 07, 1997 in ~ 11:22:51HUMPTY DUMPTYHumpty Dumpty sat on a wall.Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.All the King"s Horses and also all the King"s guys Came and also ate scrambled egg again. Father Bear : Someone has actually been eating my porridge. Mother Bear : Someone has actually been eating my porridge.Baby be affected by each other (crying): Someone has actually been eating my porridge!Granny be affected by each other : Oh, will you all please cut it out?! i haven"t even served the porridge yet! Why is a pig"s tail like acquiring up at 3 am? ... Its twirly. Why go Robin Hood rob only the rich? ... Since the negative had no money. Horse walks into a bar. Bartender asks him, "Why the lengthy face?" two peanuts walking under the street, among them"s a salted. What sort of rocks are on the bottom of the Mississippi River? WET rocks. What is a plumbers favourite flower? ... Draineeums. What carry out you contact a pumped-up pumpkin? ... A jock o"lantern. ... See the long one in the variation 1 page around Dr. Seuss, too. Essay on harmful impacts of oil on sea life indigenous an elementary-age youngster in England: "When my Mum opened a tin of sardines last night that was complete of oil. And sure enough, every the sardines to be dead." test question: What room the advantages of mother"s milk end other creates of milk?Answer: It"s cleaner, it"s cheaper and the cat can"t gain it. A teacher request her class for sentences using the word "beans". "My father grow beans," said one student."My father cooks beans," stated another.Then a 3rd spoke increase : "We space all person beans." Isn"t making a smoking ar in a restaurant a tiny like make a peeing ar in the swim pool? "Eggplant" - A location where chicken work. A six-year-old girl"s view of "people:" civilization are composed of girls and boys, additionally men and women. Boys room no good at all till they thrive up and also get married. Males who don"t acquire married are no great either. Boys room an horrible bother. They want every little thing they see other than soap. My mom is a woman and also my dad is a man. A woman is a grown increase girl v children. Mine dad is such a nice man that i think the must have actually been a girl when he to be a little boy. One horsepower: the energy required to traction a dead equine 550 feet in 1 second. A well known magazine photographer was dispatched come a well known haunted residence to get shots of the apparition residing there. In the haunted house, when the clock struck 12 midnight, the apparition showed up on the staircase landing. Amazingly, the apparition make (like a super-model) for the photographer! but lighting was very bad at the moment and also the camera flash batteries to be LOW. Anyway, the photographer snapped away. Yet the photos did not come the end well because of the low batteries. He later explained to his ceo at the magazine this way: "The soul was willing, but the flash to be weak." for this reason the Symphony Orchestra was play a concert in the park and was in the center of Beethoven"s 9th Symphony. The basses, in the earlier of the orchestra, chose they had a couple of minutes to spare prior to being asked come play anything, for this reason they ran across the street to the pub for part ale. It was a publicly day, for this reason they found some string to wrap roughly their music stands to secure your music if they were gone. Once at the tavern, they might hear the music and also keep up with the development of the piece. After ~ one, two or probably three rounds, they chose that they had actually to hurry since the last activity of the nine symphony was underway.

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They stumbled back onto the bandstand and also were fumbling through the string, do the efforts to gain it loose, yet not having actually much success. The conductor saw what to be happening and instantly sized up the situation: it to be the bottom of the ninth, the score to be tied and the basses were loaded.